So you say you can't meditate?

 3-Minute Video Series

I never thought I could either because what I'd been taught about meditation was this:

If you simply relaxed and focused on your breath, you'd drop into bliss. 

This never happened to me, so I stopped trying to meditate.

Today, I know better. I also know that we have been sold a false bill of goods about how to meditate.

Meditation, as described by someone I deeply admire, Jon Kabbat-Zinn,  is nothing more than "focused attention."

Meditation invites us to a stillpoint where we are focused on one thing, just one. Doing so can actually slow those racing thoughts and eventually quiet the mind down altogether.

Or not. Sometimes our mind still wanders all over the place. We can still meditate. All we have to do is bring our attention back to our point of concentration (a breath, a word, a flame, etc) and the mind settles down once again.

Repeating this process over and over again is meditation.

If you're lucky, and faithful to meditation practice, your mind will become more stable and steady. You will be able to access greater peace, see yourself more clearly, and gain insight. But only with time and practice.

This week's Vlog features my favorite technique for beginning meditation. It can be done anytime, anywhere—an airport, your garden, in your bed. It is easy and enjoyable.

Listening Meditation.

This form of meditation (again, focused concentration) brings me back to the present moment wherever I am—and when that happens, I am more at ease with my life—one of the wonderful benefits of meditation. This can be true for you too!

Why don't you try it and see?

If you can do this very simple practice for "Portable Peace," you can meditate. 

Congratulations!

Today's  3-Minute Video 

Portable Peace: "Listening Meditation"

3 minute video  Watch Now

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On March 24 OR 25 (you choose your date) I am offering a Metta Retreat--online! 

Come, learn, practice Metta with me: how to be unconditionally friendly to yourself and all beings through a profound and centuries old blessing practice. 

Metta is often called "Loving-kindness practice."

 

 If you're interesting in reading an article I wrote on Metta (loving-kindness practice), you can read the article here.

 

This is my primary form of meditation and it has brought me the greatest peace I have ever known. 

 

I guarantee Metta (and the retreat) will open your heart wider than it has ever been opened before! Learn more here.

 

Post Holiday Contentment

It's 8:00 a.m. and the house is quiet. Just me and the few birds who winter here, the Bay, and shades of  gray skies.

My husband has returned to work after some time off and I am grateful to be here ... in this place of nest ... able to take some time to reflect and be.

Taking time to sit and ponder, to some of us, might feel like wasting time. This morning my experience of contemplation has brought great riches. One of which is the awareness of how often I simply launch into my day with the fervor of an athlete, and how I often avoid taking morning time to truly reflect—to sit and allow thoughts to come and go. To follow their savory breadcrumbs and go where I am taken. To rest into pure experience ...

Otherwise it is DO, DO, DO. Get things done, checked off the list, back to work and routine so one feels productive. A good contributor, a wise bread winner, someone who is doing something important with her life. Ah, how silly it all can seem when you take the time to be with yourself and sit.

And when I do give myself permission to do just that I remember that this is the "real life." It's not about accomplishing or achieving. Not even about learning and growing. But about be-ing.

And be-ing with gentleness toward myself and my thoughts which can be oh, so reprimanding and "shoulding."

To get to this gentle place (ironically) required some discipline. I did not get here by accident this morning. I had to make my way here through a minefield of computer, messages, potential noise and distraction, deadlines. I had to watch where I placed my mind and feet. To choose wisely what to engage or these precious moments that are now here and serving as my field of awareness would have lost out to "productiveness."

These are the steps I took:

No computer.
Gentle, insightful reading.
Quiet.
Music.
Candle.
Breath.
Gratitude.
Noticing, letting go of struggle, surrender.

Such a beautiful process and one that always opens me to so much more than I ever hope to receive. And, yet, why is there resistance to do this every single day? Why is it that some mornings are harder to "manage the minefield" than others?

Today it was easy to slide into Presence in this way. Tomorrow it might be a tooth and nail fight with my ego to let go into Love.

Nothing else to do, no other way to approach it, than to be gentle with one's self ...  notice ... name ... remember ... turn toward ... choose ... navigate thoughts and feelings and habits with steady calm.

Do not resist.

What we resist persists. Let it go and it flows.

Contentment is then ours.

Today, I wish you flow. To go where Love and moment-to-moment experience take you. To give yourself permission to be with yourself as kindly and gently as you would another.

May it be so for you. May it be so for all beings.

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Note: Over the weekend I read this most wonderful article: Jon Kabat-Zinn's wise advice for "news junkies." If you are someone who spends a good amount of time reading the news or watching TV news, take heed of this important message.

He says, "That's the word that's often used; we consume the news, we eat it up. And it often consumes us ... "

Here's how to break free of what could be an unhealthy news habit with Kabat-Zinn's help, including a Guided Meditation. Wonderful!

Read more

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 "What To Do When You're Feeling Blue:
30 Days of Insights and Practices to Change the "Hue" of Your Life"

Begin anytime, a self-paced class, delivered daily, guaranteed to help you rise above melancholy and embrace gladness—no matter what is happening in your life! 

Learn More and Register

Deciphering the Shoulds

 

Loving ourselves and life from where we are 

Until I decide I won't, I am penning, these blog posts in support of my ongoing sacred journey course,“Creating a Life of Contentment,"  which began Sept. 15. For one entire year, we'll be traveling together as intimate companions: to relax, let go and rest into Love; to discover the bliss of our own life. I hope you will join me here! You can learn more about the program there. 

 

Deciphering the Shoulds
 

In our “Creating a Life of Contentment” course, we’ve been talking a lot about the “shoulds,” probably because there are so darn many of them!

I know I certainly have my share.

Though this morning, as I sat in the silence, thinking about the day ahead and where I would place my energy, one particular should came to mind.

“You should make sure you meditate today.”

It’s true. I should. This is the voice of my Wise Self speaking to me. I know from experience what she sounds like because her tone is light. It resounds with healing energy. And it guides me toward something that would be very good for me.

She also speaks with very little pressure. No guilt. Just a gentle sigh of understanding if I choose not to answer her call.

Not all shoulds are bad and to be negated. Some rise up from within us to remind us of what we could do to be more loving, generous, or forgiving ... just to name a few. I often think of these good shoulds as healthy reminders.

These shoulds remind us of what we continually put off, ignore, or deny. They illuminate our excuses, laziness, or self-doubt. For me, the meditation should that has been raising her voice of late reminds me that I often do put off what would be  good for me and, instead, I focus on what needs to be done.

Self-care vs. being productive and getting it all done, handled and put away: A perpetual pebble in my shoe but one that eventually makes me so uncomfortable that I do rescue myself from its discomfort.

The last few mornings I have been heeding the call of my Wise Should Self. I have been meditating again, though I am feeling a bit unfocused so I am using some tools to help me get back into the groove again.

One is Susan Piver’s wonderful (video collection of) 10 minute sitting practices. They are short and sweet and do the trick.  (You can view one here.)

So how do you know when a should should be listened to or not?

Get quiet. Sit with yourself and ask the question: What is the energy behind this should? Does this suggestion feel like pressure? Is it pushing me toward something that may not be healthy, either now or in the long-run?

Or does this should have my best self in mind? Is it inviting me into personal health, harmony, or well-being? If you listen with the ears of your heart, you will know. You will know.

Trust that your Wise Self will speak loudly enough so that you can hear her.

Trust your self.

I’ve been trusting myself more and more and am reaping the benefits—especially spending more time in quiet. And now, a renewed meditation practice has emerged allowing me to be pleased and easily satisfied.

Contentment.

Who would have thought that a previously held should could become such a simple joy?

We’ll never know until we decipher and try ...

 ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞

 Meditation is the tongue of the soul and the language of our spirit.

~Jeremy Taylor

Women Are Like Trees

Dear Lovely Friends,

For the past two years, I have been writing a monthly column for Michigan Woman's Forum entitled "Pockets of Peace." It has been a joy to create a "peace practice" each month for women to explore their inner realms and uncover a place of ever-present inner calm.

This month I created a practice that invites you to see yourself like a tree—someone who is so solid and grounded that your peace will be virtually unshakable no matter what is happening in your life or the world at large. I invite you to read this newest "Pocket of Peace: Rootedness - An Antidote to Distress" ...

     Women are like trees, wrote Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estés in her landmark book, Women Who Run With the Wolves. Her direct remark was this: “The tree is considered immortal, for its seeds will live on, its root system shelters and revivifies, it is home to an entire food chain of life. Like a woman, a tree also has its seasons and its stages of growth: it has its winter, it has its spring.”*
     Have you ever felt like a tree? One moment a sturdy shelter, a thing of glory, then in the next, a victim of buffeting winds, tattered by the storms of life? Leaves (your efforts) wildly tossed. Branches (your emotions) split open from stress? Trunk (your heart) struck by lightning and ruptured to the core? I know I have.
     And, yet, I have also felt the towering strength of a tree within me; the solidity that is ever-present if I have a mind to notice it and to call upon it. In fact, when I think of a tree, or imagine myself to actually be a tree, I immediately feel more peaceful and calm, at ease with what life offers me. I sense we can all feel this way, taking nature’s lead by embracing a tree’s fortitude as our own.

Read the rest here ...

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I've posted my Fall Calendar of Events so I invite you to take a look.

We'll be gathering for Autumn Equinox in September, retreating with Metta (loving-kindness) practice in October, and celebrating the holiness of home in November. It feels like the most exciting season to me—one of color and soul and community coming together. Please join me! 

Click here to learn more.

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My recent Tele-Class, "Celebrating Ourselves, Even in Difficult Times" is now available on podcast for your listening pleasure. Enjoy!

From my heart to yours, may peace of body, mind, heart, and soul be yours today with these helpful tips.

Click here to begin listening ...