Grateful for the Banquet of Life - Part II

As we move through the holy days of three spiritual traditions, I offer these thoughts on three ways that we can improve our "gratitude attitude"—approaching life as a banquet, a feast—even in what feels like challenging times. 

(Part II appears today. Part I was posted earlier this week.)

Grateful for the Banquet of Life

Part II

Eat mindfully.

When your holiday table overflows with delicious concoctions, instead of gobbling your food, consider eating "mindfully." Buddhist monk, Thich Nhat Hanh, describes how in his lovely book, Peace is Every Step. Eat slowly. Take a bite and chew each forkful 8-10 times. Don't chatter through the meal. Eating with silence, or in positive conversation, allows us to connect, not only to the food but also gently to those around us. "Having the opportunity to sit with our family and friends and enjoy wonderful food is something precious, something not everyone has," Hanh says. Many people in the world are hungry. Eating mindfully, with compassion, connects us to a global family, and a bigger picture of life.

Remember your manners and use them.

Say "thank you" more often and feel what response you receive. Look people in the eyes, smile and say it; you will receive an even bigger response from them. Use the word "please." It humbles people and can change their attitude toward you. Speak to others like you want to be spoken to. Good manners beget good behavior. As each of us models positive behavior, a light shines forth to encourage others to do the same. Using the "magic words" of "please" and "thank you" can shift our perspective, keeping us mindful of the opportunities available to us.

Speak your gratitude out loud and mean it.

Vocalizing thankfulness seems to shift something inside of us. The next time you are speaking to a friend notice something sincerely wonderful about them and tell them so. Watch what happens. Their inner glow will begin kindling. Yours will too, knowing you are responsible for this little flicker. And as result, gratitude for the gift of their friendship can bloom. This is a wonderful exercise to do at family gatherings, especially over dessert. When the meal is done, when we are feeling sated and full, take the time to share an expression of appreciation, not just for the culinary skills of the cook(s), but for each person seated at the table. As we see the beauty in each person, our lives are immeasurably enriched, communication enhanced, bonds strengthened.

This holiday season may we strive to behave better at the feast. I wish you a bountiful table, loving friends and family, and a heart so full, that upon departing, we burst forth into the world showering ourselves—and everyone we meet—with thankfulness and an attitude of appreciation.

~~~~~

 "What To Do When You're Feeling Blue:
30 Days of Insights and Practices to Change the "Hue" of Your Life"

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Gratitude for the Banquet of Life - Part I

As we move into the holy days of three spiritual traditions, I offer these thoughts on three ways that we can improve our "gratitude attitude"—approaching life as a banquet, a feast—even in what feels like challenging times. 

(Part I appears today. Part II will be posted on Friday.)

Grateful for the Banquet of Life

Part I

Each fall and winter, I find myself falling into the lap of gratitude. Perhaps it’s the changing of seasons, or the simple knowing that significant holidays are around the corner, that I sink into feelings of appreciation for life, and my life, in particular.

For many of us, 2011 has been a year of unexpected ups and downs. My own life is no exception. What comes to mind, however, is how we can still set a place for gratitude at the table of life, despite having plates laden with reality-jarring experiences. Can we be grateful for all that is, and even all that is not?

One day, as I sat in my local library, pondering these exact questions (and admittedly, feeling a bit sorry for myself—it was one of those days), I looked up to discover a book on the new arrivals shelf calling out to me: How We Behave at the Feast: Reflections on Living in an Age of Plenty, by Dwight Currie. Turning to the first page, this is what I read:

“Never before in human history have so many of us luxuriated in pleasures once reserved for royalty. Look at the comforts, the conveniences, the cars, and the clothes. Think of the leisure, the travel, the arts, and the culture we enjoy. ...So I ask, ‘Are we having fun yet?’ Why not? What’s wrong?”

Currie goes on to say that we are fast becoming a nation full of whiners. We are anxious, bitter, confused. We are envious, fearful, greedy, and hostile. “Why this alphabet soup,” he asks,” of indigestion as we belly up to a buffet of unprecedented bounty?” He continues by admonishing us, “We have forgotten our manners. We care too much about what we can get—how much we inherit—too little about how we behave.” The man packs a punch, that’s for sure, and reading his words humbled me greatly.

The author’s observations seemed to me to be true. We are rude to one another in public places, we grab what we can get (and feel we deserve more), we complain loudly if things don’t go our way, and, in general, behave pretty badly while seated at this banquet we call life. We live in the richest country in the world, and, yet, treat our abundance and the choices offered us as if they were nothing special at all.

As a young girl, I witnessed a powerful lesson on this very subject. We welcomed a young man from Nigeria into our home. Our church had sponsored his arrival in the United States and host families were helping him make the transition. My mother took him to the local supermarket for food, and, in complete awe of the cornucopia laid out before him, he stood motionless, paralyzed, unable to make a decision on what to purchase. I can only imagine how his supermarket at home must have looked, if, indeed, there was such a thing. We take so much for granted.

What can we do every day, especially this holiday season, to tap into greater appreciation of the bounty we have been given? How can we move from whining about life, to whistling to the delight of its melody? We can read Dwight Currie’s book which offers us 52 seasonal readings to help us light the inner fire of gratitude. Or, we can start where we are right now, wipe the lenses through which we view the world, and try to walk through life with greater awareness of the blessings that abound—yes, even in times that may feel challenging.

On Friday, I'll post 3 powerful spiritual practices that can help us do this. 
Stay tuned!

~~~~~

 "What To Do When You're Feeling Blue:
30 Days of Insights and Practices to Change the "Hue" of Your Life"

Begin anytime, a self-paced class, delivered daily, guaranteed to help you rise above melancholy and embrace gladness—no matter what is happening in your life! 

Learn More and Register

Pausing for Gratitude

 Loving ourselves and life from where we are 

Until I decide I won't, I am penning, these blog posts in support of my ongoing sacred journey course,“Creating a Life of Contentment,"  which began Sept. 15. For one entire year, we'll be traveling together as intimate companions: to relax, let go and rest into Love; to discover the bliss of our own life. I hope you will join me here! You can learn more about the program there. 

Pausing for Gratitude

I've just returned from spending 4 days "on the road." Leading an Autumn Equinox program, meeting with women for spiritual direction/mentoring, and visiting with some of my family.

As I return to the Bay, my heart is filled with gratitude.

When I have a grateful heart I feel completely content, how about you?

I'm certain there is a very deep connection between contentment and gratitude.

Simply put, when we feel grateful, we are happy for what we have, for what is right here. There is nothing we lack. We are in tune with the gifts to be found in the present moment.

This past week I experienced numerous moments of gratitude. One that stands out is the love and support of my ever-faithful mother. She is 82. When I "go home," it's as if I never left and I am 18 again. "Can I fix you something to eat?" she offers. "Here, take this, a little spending money for you. Buy yourself something nice." Sweet gestures of caring that never seem to end, though I know someday they will ...

Feelings of appreciation well up in me for the presence of this love—nurturing love—embodied in the form of my mom.

Another is this: The blessing of being able to do "good work" in the world, work I love. To spend an intimate evening with a group of women who want to live awake and aware—as their best selves, living in Love in their own way, who desire to also be of service to others.

An unexpected visit from my husband who drove 165 miles to pick me up. An early morning jaunt to a farmer's market in a quaint riverside town to load up on fresh produce. Lunch at an organic restaurant I hadn't been to in nearly 5 years.

My gratitude list is long, now that I've taken the time to think back upon the past week. Too many to list, it seems. And, in that, my heart is full.

Contentment.

How about you? Gratitude is such a potent spiritual practice. Do you notice how satisfied and at ease you feel when you are in touch with the good things in your life?

And what if we took pauses throughout our day to remember "our gratitudes?" We could do this just like we pause and take a breath to ground and center us.

I like that idea. A sacred pause infused with gratitude. Any takers?

∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ 

If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.
Meister Eckhart

Support for Your Journey

Announcing!

My next FREE Tele-Class ...

... for all "Ladies in Waiting"

... for women in transition!

I know what it's like to feel as if your life is on hold ... or not the way you want it ... or the way you're sure it should be.

I know what it's like to try to live "in the meantime," when not much makes sense, and you're not sure whether to stay or go, give up or keep trying.

I have the feeling you do, too.

This is what I mean by being a Lady-in-Waiting or a woman in transition. It's not an easy road to walk because we are NOT taught how to wait or be patient or to let go ... Nor do we live in a society that encourages this.

Which is exactly what is required of any Lady-in-Waiting!

Join me for a free Tele-Class on living "in the meantime" 

 and I'll share my personal list with you of  

"How to Wait with Grace,"  

when you absolutely don't want to or don't know how.

When: Monday, August 30 ~ 8:30 - 9:30 p.m. (EST)

Format: Presentation, A Guided Meditation for "Living in Transition with Ease," and (live) Q and A.
(You can send me your questions ahead of time and I will answer them on the call.)

Pre-Registration: Send me an e-mail that says you'd like to attend.
Send it through the Contact Box here.
I'll send you a confirmation e-mail with the Dial-In number and Access Code.

(This call is free, but you may have to pay your phone server's long-distance charges.)

I look forward to being in Presence with you and connecting soul-to-soul.

~~~~~~~

I’m curious. How is your spiritual health these days? Is your spirit in good shape? Are you peaceful and at ease? Openhearted and loving? Grateful and kind?

The state of our spirit, perhaps even more than our state of body and mind, can influence the quality of our days. As busy women today, we know we are supposed to take good care of our physical health, our emotional health, too. But we don’t read or hear much about how important it is to tend out spirit.

Yet, in my own life, especially during the child bearing years, when days felt chaotic or overwhelming, taking time to nurture my spirit could change everything. Stress walked out the door; inner ease took up residence, and I could breathe again. Life felt very different when I remembered to make my spiritual health a priority.

So, how can a busy woman tend to her spirit? Here are seven ways that are sure to please—and restore health and harmony.

Stop

Give yourself permission to sit down. Lay down. Put your feet up and do absolutely nothing.

Rest is vitally important to our well-being and, yet, according to studies today, most women say they are exhausted. In the name of busyness and productivity, we do not stop. We move through our days like the Eveready Bunny. We just keep going and going and going …

M. Scott Peck, author of The Road Less Traveled, was once asked how he accomplished so much in a day. He replied, “Because I spend two hours a day doing absolutely nothing.” To Peck, rest was sacred. It is. Giving ourselves permission to “be” instead of “do,” to get off the fast-track and honor the quieter places within ourselves, actually creates space for productivity.

Breathe

Really breathe. Take time each day to simply sit—anywhere, in your car, at your desk—and focus on your breath. Bring your attention to the in-breath and the out-breath; breathing in for 8 counts, out for 10.

Consciously breathing in this way eases the body. It creates new pathways in the mind, releases emotions, opens the heart. It connects us with our innate peace, a virtue of the spirit. Did you know that the words breath and spirit come from the same Latin word, spiritus? This implies that breathing is, indeed, a sacred act.

Seek silence and solitude

Give yourself a “time out”—time to sit in the quiet and be alone with yourself. Turn off the television, the radio, and put away the newspaper. Halt the input so you can get in touch with a gentler place inside of you.

In a world of noise and commotion, silence and alone time are vital to well-being. Overstimulation of our senses and constant input can make us anxious or depressed. Within each of us is an oasis of calm, but it is not one that will seek us out. We must drop down inside ourselves to find it if we wish to rest beneath its sheltering palms and drink of its cooling waters. Everyone deserves an oasis in the busyness of life. Not to mention that you deserve the pleasure of your own company, now and then!

Go outside

Even in the midst of a busy day, you can step outside, look up at the sky, feel your feet upon the earth, and hone in on the beauty found in nature. Connecting with the natural world is an effortless way to re-connect with your spirit.

We can turn our senses up to high and really notice the brilliance that is all around us: see the colors, hear the sounds, smell the freshness of Mother Nature. By doing so, we are able to get in touch with the uniqueness, the majesty, of what is here, right now, right in front of us. Awe is restored and our spirit is “naturally,” uplifted. The many features and forms of nature remind us that life is good, full of beauty and hope.

Practice

Utilize daily practices that nurture your spirit; activities that bring you peace of body, mind, and heart.

You may already have some of your own: prayer, meditation, yoga, walking, chanting, singing, dancing, tai chi, gardening, devotional reading, journaling, and more. Or, you might like to explore new ones if yours are feeling a bit stale. There are as many spiritual practices as there are people. The key is to find those that bring you joy.

In as little as 20-minutes a day, we can move away from thoughts and feelings of anxiousness, depression, or frustration and return to our natural state of equanimity. Spiritual practices work, as long as we put them to work for us. Time and faithfulness are key.

Give

Consider the fact that if you are experiencing more negative emotions than positive ones, you may be overly focused on your self. A ‘What about me?’ attitude is a surefire way to stay disconnected from your spirit.

Focusing on others—‘What can I give? How can I help?’—can shift our perspective. We see there are others who are less fortunate than ourselves. Giving and being of service to others opens our heart to the plights of others; fosters feelings of lovingkindness. We may even begin to feel that we are finding or fulfilling our life purpose. By applying the virtue of generosity, we are making a difference in the world—and that is spirit-enhancing!

Gratitude

Finally, say ‘Thank you’ often. Say it out loud to people. Write your feelings of gratitude in a daily journal. Offer a prayer of gratitude to a Higher Power for all that you have been given, for the gift of life itself.

An attitude of gratitude may be the most powerful virtue of the spirit. Why? Because walking around with gratitude in our heart enables us to see life through lenses of appreciation. It grows a habit of honing in on what is right, instead of what is wrong or lacking. When we are able to perceive our day full of blessings or little joys, our lightheartedness washes over others making them feel good, too, and in an ailing world, we can certainly use more of that. The mystic writer, Meister Eckhart, may have said it best, “If the only prayer you ever say in your life is thank you, it will be enough.” 

Take good care of your spirit and it will take good care of you. Breathe on!

Gratitude for Kindred Spirits

Today, my heart is full of gratitude for each of you, for being here with me, day after day, in this sacred space. I appreciate the gift of your friendship. And I marvel at the faithfulness you show toward your spiritual journey. You inspire me!

Today, a poem of appreciation for you ...

"You are a kindred spirit!

Your faithfulness and honesty call forth the best in me. 

When I am with you it is easy to laugh

and to dream 
my soul comes to life.

Because of you circles of friendship are widened

and gratitude wells up within me.

Your tears are important and touch the deepest part of me. 

Your smile makes my heart dance 

and being with you is being home.

The gift of your friendship blesses me and blesses the world.*"

No matter where you live or what spiritual path you embrace, may you experience the sacred within and without, every day of the year.




~~~~~
*From a greeting card crafted by the Sisters of St. Joseph of LaGrange, Il. who "encourage and affirm creativity in ourselves and all persons. Our mission of unity brings us closer in our time to a deeper awareness of our communion with God and all creation." www.ministryofthearts.org


Image courtesy of womenoftheredtent.com