Loving ourselves and life from where we are
I’m counting down to contentment — to the starting date of my new sacred journey course,“Creating a Life of Contentment," which begins Sept. 15. For one entire year we will travel together as intimate companions: to relax, let go and rest into Love; to discover the bliss of our own life. I hope you will join me! You can learn all about it here.
Leaning Into Love
Today is my 8th wedding anniversary. I should say “our” anniversary.
This journey into “ours” and “us” has been a grand leaning into Love. It was not always easy,
We dedicated ourselves to learning how to love one another through our essence (“spirit identity”) rather than our false, personality-packed, ego selves. Brad and I wanted a different kind of relationship: one that was conscious and ever-evolving.
It has been that. And completely transformational all along the way. Through trial and error and many “ego abductions,” we have “arrived” at a place of profound love, acceptance, and compassion for ourselves and for one another.
It has been a blessing to do “the good work of self” in relationship with someone else.
We wrote about this journey in our book, Perfect Love: How to Find Yours and Make It Last Forever.
I’d also describe our relationship as one of deep Contentment.
So, the $1million question is: How do you find Contentment in a relationship?
This is my answer in a nutshell.
Be able to see the whole of your partner and embrace every aspect of him or her with compassion.
Be able to see your whole self too—your ego and your wise self. Enfold yourselves in compassion because it is not easy being human and it is not easy being in an intimate relationship with anyone.
And be kind. Nurture one another, listen with your heart, keep touching one another, grow separately as individuals and together as a couple, laugh, treat your partner as you wish to be treated.
Remember what Love feels, tastes, smells and sounds like, then keep pointing your selves in that direction. Follow the breadcrumbs and let hope and commitment light your way.
Well, that’s more than a nutshell full, isn’t it?
3 comments:
Congratulations on your 8th anniversary. May you enjoy many more ~
I'm coming up on 34 years married. It takes a lot of work to sustain a relationship through all the personal and family changes in that amount of time. I thought as the years passed it would get easier, but it hasn't. In some ways it's actually harder because we've already been through so many transitions that we are no where near where we started...and I just get tired.
I remember reading an article about Margaret Mead where she proposed that humans are built to have different relationships in different phases of their life. I was young at the time and didn't understand what she meant. I do now and in some ways I agree. It has been a challenge to spend 34 years with the same person.
Hello Sharon, thank you for sharing your thoughts. It touches my heart what you speak of here. Longterm relationships are not easy. Obviously many reasons for this but one is that each person changes so much over a long period of time.
Daphne Kingma (you may remember her as one of our Guest Mentors for the Buddha Chick Training) wrote a powerful book on this. It is titled "The Future of Love." She cites exactly what you state. That, in reality, if we are attending to our soul's growth, we may have a number of intimate relationships in our lives that support that growth. It explains why relationships may have to end at certain times because our soul has done its work with that person and we are being asked to move on. She feels that each person would likely have approx. 3 serious intimate partners/spouses if we attuned ourselves to our soul growth. I find this very interesting.
BTW, a soul partner can also be a friend, mother, child, sibling...
You may enjoy the book. I bet you could find in through inter-library loan or for a song at amazon.com
I hope you will take comfort in knowing that you are not alone in this challenge, Sharon.
Reading some of your older posts.
What a beautiful picture.
Belated congratulations.
Married young, my first love and it lasted 22 years. A few serious relationships
over the next 20 years. Now when I look back - none of them taught me anything except they were not for me. Very contented at this time but do miss the fact that my true soul mate never arrived.
You bless me with your sharing...
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